10/12/2006: "One week down, one more to go."

Wow.. it's just been one of those weeks, hasn't it? I've had 3 midterms, one chapter quiz, half a book to read, and a paper to write. So basically every night has been devoted to reading and studying. This, after nearly a solid week, starts to takes its toll. I'm generally tired as of late, and rather irritable, since it feels like my "life" is draining away. Living, eating, and sleeping purely to go study more and take more tests isn't really my ideal.

I got an A on one of my midterms, and I feel good about the other two. The paper, I think it was alright, so I'm not too worried. I have two more midterms, need to read the other half of the book, and write a paper for next week, so this hectic schedule's going to continue for another 7 days.. what fun.

Other highlights from this week include learning on Tuesday that one of my classmates thinks I'm a "really mean" person. Today I learned that a fair portion of my other class dislikes me to such an extent that I became a topic of conversation during their late-night "cram session" and they talked about how they hoped I fail the exam and they do so much better than me on the test. It should be noted that I've never said a cross word to these people, I've been cordial, helped them in getting assignments or notes that they've missed.. and this is how they act. They make no effort to get to know me, and they decide that I must be arrogant and deserve to fail. While I'm not in school to "make friends", and whether people "like me" or not isn't really my number 1 goal, but it's still not ideal to know that these two-faced people who chat with you hold resentment for you behind your back.

Way to go, world.

In the end, I just feel really beaten down by everything. I know that on the surface things aren't so bad. I'm getting good grades, I'm learning and advancing. My language skills are getting better. Every morning, though, I wake up 30 minutes to an hour before the alarm. I pull the sheet over my head in the hopes of sleeping, delaying the inevitable. When it does go off, or I decide that I should get moving before I hear it, I can barely drag myself out of bed. I generally just sit there and stare at the alarm clock until I finally drag myself up and out and into the shower.

I know it's all just in my head, but that doesn't really help much. I'm tired of dealing with people. I'm tired of the day-to-day. Blah.

Need to read an article tonight, read and review it, then go back to school tomorrow. Write a paper this weekend, and start the cycle over again. One more week of late nights, reading books, writing papers, and hopefully it'll be done after this week. I hope.

I hate feeling this way.


Jason